Been wondering why dating has to be so hard for me when every one else seems to be having it easy. I always feel hyperventilated when I get the question “are you seeing someone?”
I recently asked my friends to tell me why I am single. Majority of them said I don’t go out enough. While others said I don’t put myself out there enough. As a result they set me on a couple of blind dates (I didn’t like) and they signed me up for dating apps (majority of the people I met there were either creepos or misfits) so I took down the apps.
I decided to do things differently 6 months ago when I moved to a new city. I challenged myself to ask 3 guys in the new city out on a date. This is something I always said I was never going to do when I was younger. “African girls do not ask boys out” i would usually tell myself. But i was willing to try something new.
I was able to find two. I asked them out and it was the most embarrassing and humiliating thing I had ever done. One of the guys I asked out stopped saying hi to me and started acting really awkward. Anyways, I learnt my lesson. Not sure I’d be asking anybody out anytime soon.
It can be depressing. Being 26 years old, lonely, not having anyone text or call you can really be hard. What’s even worse is the thought of valentine’s day.
I wish that my loneliness ends this year. My biggest fear is meeting someone who has commitment issues. I pray that i find someone (or he finds me) with an amazing personality who is not afraid of commitments. I deserve to be loved and to love in return.
I pray that one day i too can look love in the eyes and say “I have waited for you for two eternities…. Welcome!”
While I wait (and while I am single), I would keep working on myself, I’d refrain from comparing myself to others, I would keep traveling, I’d learn to be more extroverted, I’d keep my heart open, I’d hope for the best and most importantly I would trust God’s timing!!
“God’s timing is perfect, even when he appears catastrophically late.”-Dr. James Dobson